Saddle Burrs

By Brother Thomas Blankenship

We all have an effect on the people around us and send a message without ever saying a word. Communication occurs on levels beyond conscious thought every minute of every day. We are taught as children how to read facial expressions, hand and body gestures. As adults, seldom do we consider why a person seems friendly or threatening without ever having met that person before. Is it just a “gut feeling” or something more?

A good example is when adults encounter a baby just a few months old. A normally prim and proper person can display exaggerated or foolish facial expressions trying to cause the baby to laugh or smile. Through this process the baby learns how to read expressions and body gestures without ever speaking a word. The child will take these experiences and continue learning to “read” body language without conscious thought.

The most memorable example of “nonverbal” communication I ever experienced happened when my boys were eight and nine years old. They were playing baseball in the local city park league. A nine year old boy on the opposing team caught my attention; he had to be the bravest boy I ever encountered. Physically he had some serious challenges just to walk much less trying to run. His spine and hips were deformed and he could not stand up straight. This boy was determined to play ball with normal healthy boys. Naturally the other boys saw him as an “easy out”, because the best he could manage was a fast shuffling walk.

Now that you have an idea why he caught my attention, let me describe what happened next. All the parents were seated either in the stands behind home plate or down the sidelines in lawn chairs. His mother was sitting directly behind home plate in the first row. His turn at bat arrived. He stepped up to the plate, settled in the batter’s box. One of the coaches began to pitch to him. On the second pitch he made solid contact and dropped into left field between the fielders, and he was off for first base. His mom jumped out of her seat and started dancing behind home plate yelling “RUN, RUN”. He was moving as fast as he could go and reached a point about two steps from the base when the thrown ball reached first base. A disappointed and rather dejected boy turned and headed back to home plate to retrieve his bat. Mom, the cheerleader, started yelling “Good job”. The boy’s facial expression indicated he thought other wise. Upon reaching his bat he turned and looked at his mother, took his right thumb and index finger reached up and pinched his nose. Turning he picked up his bat and walked back to the bench and sat down never saying a word. At this point the parents erupted in laughter. I believe the expression “rolling in the aisles” would describe the situation.

This young boy demonstrated unspoken communication in such an eloquent manner. Without ever making a single verbal sound he communicated volumes. He had a single message to get across and never thought about what his body language was saying. This caused me to start thinking and watching other people. What do single gestures or groups of gestures mean?

Over the next few weeks the memory of that baseball player’s actions kept playing over and over again. For some reason my unconscious thought processes would not let up. Then I realized why. Every minute of every day we send an unconious message by our actions and we will affect someone.

Revelations tend to play havoc with our neatly organized perceptions of reality. Do I now have to carefully consider every gesture and action? Must I now plaster a smile on my face and act like a doormat? Must I be painfully and brutally honest at all times? Can I get away with a little white lie now and then? It gets rather unsettling when you begin considering possibilities. I finally came to the conclusion: Honesty is easier to accomplish if mouth and actions match. The most effective way to communicate is to close your mouth more often and let your actions speak.

During this time of reflection my mind presented an odd comparison in reality; a saddle burr Have you ever thought about what it is and what it can accomplish? First of all it is a small seed that has no motive power of its own. It is totally dependent upon other creatures or forces to move to another place. It is physically tiny, mere grams in weight, yet it can cause an effect out of proportion to its size. A horse ridden through the field picks one up and through movement lodges it beneath the saddle pad; shortly this tiny seed causes the horse to become hard to control. Most horses weigh hundreds of pounds yet this tiny burr can control them simply by existing.

Simple acts or tiny gestures can have effects much larger than you think and most of the time the effects are not where you expect to see them. A simple smile as you walk into someone’s office, opening a door, listening instead of talking, or one of a hundred other possibilities can have larger effects than the effort exerted.

Chances of me changing society at large are miniscule at best because no single individual has the ability to change society by himself. History was usually changed by a larger group within society. My only chance to effect change is by changing my world one person at a time. It is time to become a saddle burr and let the forces of life position me as the silent irritant that causes positive change. How about you?

Brother Thomas Blankenship is a member and volunteer at sure HOPE Christian Assembly in Middletown, Ohio.
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